AND NOW, FROM THE ALOLAN ISLANDS, A CREATURE SO FEARSOME, SO TERRIBLE, SO MIND-BENDINGLY LARGE THAT THOSE OF YOU WITH WEAK CONSTITUTIONS MAY WANT TO LEAVE THE STADIUM, READY OR NOT, HERE HE COMES, QUAKE WITH FEAR YOU MORTAL FOOLS, BOW DOWN BEFORE THE AWESOME MIGHT OF…

…the huge guy who’s carrying the real contestant

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